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Virgo Spring Guide

Aliza Faragher


Sensitive Virgo never cries in public....unless it's allergy season. Virgos are the kings and queens of "I'm not crying, it's just allergies." Because it literally is always allergies. When springtime hits, Virgo must be prepared to confront some of their least favorite things: pollen, flowers blooming, and people forcing them to be joyful in the outdoors. Stock up on your preferred allergy med so that you can at least get to your favorite thing - spring cleaning - in relative comfort.


So salty. So crispy. So dependable. You don't like the mystery of trying some bullshit new trendy food. As everyone's "experimenting" this spring with "exotic condiments" and "cactus water," you'll have the last laugh as you dunk your fries into some classic Heinz ketchup. It's a safe choice. And safe is your middle name.


Don't get burned Virgo! You're already so sensitive from your allergies, and if you absolutely must leave your house to picnic at the park (ugh) or go to brunch (why are your friends always brunching??), you will not fall victim to the sun's obnoxious rays. Even though you've read all the research that shows that SPF 100 is no different than SPF 45, you're not going to take any chances.


Hey, is that guy in the Secret Service? Nope. It's just Virgo, venturing out into the sunlight. You know the risks of staring at the sun. You know the risks of wearing sunglasses on a face covered with sunscreen. You need maximum protection. You need Oakleys.


Nothing screams "I love spring in an understated way" better than your very own chic DEERDANA x Align Limited Edition Virgo pin. Hit that.